First and foremost, I apologize for my MIA status.  Lately, it feels as if I need to pushed to the edge before I’m able to show any emotion.  Now my cup is overflowing.  Grand.  My head is a bit foggy, has been for quite some time.  All of this results in my hermit mode… until now.

Gary Lightbody said, “lash out first… at all the things you don’t like or understand”.

I’m just exhausted from the effort.

This week’s playlist goes as follows.
1. Hard to Find – The American Analog Set (thank you, Lee)
2. A Call to Apathy – The Shins
3. Wish You Were Here – Ryan Adams
4. Falling Out of Love – Aqualung
5. Paranoia in B Flat Major – The Avett Brothers
6. It Ain’t Me Babe – Bob Dylan
7. Scare Easy – Mudcrutch
8. Against All Odds – The Postal Service
9. No One’s Gonna Love You – Band of Horses
10. How We Operate – Gomez
11. The Greatest Sum (acoustic) – The Avett Brothers
12. Wings – Josh Ritter
13. Die Alone – Ingrid Michaelson
14. Don’t Think Twice, It’s Alright – Bob Dylan
(I’m sorry Nick Drake, but you dropped the ball on this one.)
15. Day Old Blues – Kings of Leon
16. It’s Alright, Ma (I’m Only Bleeding) – Bob Dylan
17. Set Fire to the Third Bar – Snow Patrol f/t Martha Wainwright
18. Cold Desert – Kings of Leon
19. California Stars – Wilco
20. See the World – Gomez
21. Call An Ambulance – Albert Hammond Jr.

“Leave your stepping stones behind, something calls for you.
Forget the dead you’ve left, they will not follow you.
The vagabond who’s rapping at your door
Is standing in the clothes that you once wore.
Strike another match, go start anew
And it’s all over now, Baby Blue.”

-Bob Dylan

Only a matter of time until it breaks loose.

No one likes to be the bad guy.  Or gal.

What can you do.

More on this later -

“So if I’m being honest with you
and it seems like I’m being cruel
at least you didn’t get a rip off.
And you’ll know how I’ll feel
I’ve got faith in you.”

“What is wanted is not the will to believe,
but the wish to find out,
which is the exact opposite.”
~ Bertrand Russell

I chose Ryan to serenade me before rest.
I’m taking a load off, Annie.
My first day of work went off without a hitch.
Jared is coming to visit Thanksgiving weekend.  [Dance!]
I’m happy to say I’ll be too busy for the futile and such.
I miss school.
Few folks drive me batty.  Now, not everyone at once, please.
I need to work out.
‘The Blue’ is the best salad from Zaxby’s, hands down.
My car is in desperate need of a bath.
I need to shave my legs, hairy mongrel.
I’m switching back and forth between Twilight and Slaughterhouse Five.
What a combination.  Vonnegut would roll over in his grave.
Smoking is for the bored and idle.
Neither of which I am, so cease such I SHALL.
I’ve got a lot of ideas.
I’ve been reading up quite a bit on different philosophies and whatnot.
If I find anything extra thought-provoking the further I read, I’ll be sure to share.
“A Punch of Pacifist” …now that’s witty.  Grin-worthy.
I should be asleep.

I’d say pass up Come Pick Me Up

but definitely listen to the intense version of Down In A Hole

“If I could I’d fold myself away like a card table
a concertina or a murphy bed, I would
but I wasn’t made that way
so you know instead…
I’m open all night and the customers come to stay
and everybody tips
but not enough to knock me over
…and I’m so tired.”

Oh my god, whatever… etc…

“i am thinking it’s a sign
that the freckles in our eyes are mirror images
and when we kiss they’re perfectly aligned
and I have to speculate
that God himself did make
us into corresponding shapes
like puzzle pieces from the clay…”

Wednesday?  Ahh!  Wednesday, it is.  Definitely.  Middle of the week.
It’s been a long day.

But an amazing day!

   My day started out, waking up to rain, lots of it.  So instead of getting up when I promised myself I would, I stayed in bed and dove into a book for another hour and a half.  Didn’t really discover any new favorite lines but I’m almost to the climax of the book, if you want to call it that.
     I missed an important call whilst in the shower around 3:40p.  The job I was hired for wasn’t scheduled to start until November 17th but fate stepped in and I actually begin on Monday the 13th… of October!    So, needless to say, I danced a little jig and let out a scream before even hanging up the phone (slightly embarassing).  Either way, I was very excited, am currently very excited… my first real job.  Whoo!
     Another exciting thing, as of yesterday, I am currectly being courted by Jared via jars.  Ahahaa, joke, joke, kid.  Well, not really joking, just about the jars.  (Courting – quarting)  Moving along.  He’s a catch and a keeper, I am convinced.  Intelligent.  Tall.  Dark.  Handsome.  Witty.  Hilarious.  And we both bite out nails.
     I feel like I’m missing something.

All in all, an excellent day.    Grin.

OH, here are pictures of Whitney’s hair.  I don’t mean to be a spoiler. (Hope you don’t mind, W.)

    

 So, with the new job comes Orientation at 9 am.    Sleep well, world. xoxo

“true, it may seem like a stretch
but its thoughts like this that catch
my troubled head when you’re away
when i am missing you to death
when you are out there on the road
for several weeks of shows
and when you scan the radio 
i hope this song will guide you home

they will see us waving from such great heights,
“come down now”, they’ll say
but everything looks perfect from far away,
“come down now”, but we’ll stay…

i tried my best to leave
this all on your machine
but the persistent beat it sounded thin
upon listening
and that frankly will not fly
you will hear the shrillest highs
and lowest lows with the windows down
when this is guiding you home

they will see us waving from such great heights…”

Postal Service, Such Great Heights

Or if you enjoy Iron & Wine’s rendition

“…I’m talking about collapsing and screaming at the moon.
But I’m a better (man) girl for having gone through it.
Yes, I’m a better (man) girl for having gone though…”

So, here goes, my first blog via WordPress

     Unfortunately, today’s been somewhat lackluster.  I’m not sure if I’ve even attempted accomplishing anything on my “to do” list, other than learning how to strum a G-chord.  One thing I have been able to check off, though, is snagging a job.  My interview on Monday went well enough to have a job offered to me right on the spot!  Excitement mixed with a snarl; I think I’m ready for a “9 to 5″…  Although I’m sure there’ll be some complaining about such a scheduled life restricting my free spirit, ahaha, eventually.  Waaaait for it.
     I’m still sifting through Slaughterhouse Five, which I find almost boring having it follow Cat’s Cradle.  I fear not, though, Vonnegut hasn’t let me down yet.  My favorite excerpt so far reads, “When he opened his eyes, he was on the bottom of the pool, and there was beautiful music everywhere.  He lost conciousness, but the music went on.  He dimly sensed that somebody was rescuing him.  Billy resented that.”  I don’t mean to sound so morbid in sharing those sentences.  Writing such as this has always caught my attention, although dark, still beautifully worded.  Another example, “She celebrated frustration by clapping her hands.”  I only wish I was so eloquent.
     The weather has been a tease of sorts.  I keep wanting it to be cold, at least… cool (CAHHMME AAAHHNNN!), but I’m still pulling on t-shirts and flip-flops for the day.  The leaves are covering the backyard already, which is somewhat bittersweet a view.  Roy says the leaves are still green in Henderson, TN.  He also says it’s snowing in Anchorage.  How funny it seems that his family is already shoveling the driveway while he’s still enjoying the last couple of warm-weather weeks. 
   Speaking of Mr. Justus, I’ve been pressing repeat on this Avett Brothers song he shared with me.  (Lyrics and video posted above and below.)  I can’t get enough of it, maybe because the phrases hit so close to home, and maybe because it’s something I’ve never been able to put simply, simply put.  To have such words put to such lulling music, honest and true… now that is something worth listening to.  I think that’s why I love the Avetts music so much.  Yes, it’s folksy, almost leaning towards alt-country, but it’s soothing and it gracefully takes you back to memories, or shows you something the future can hold, with a warm glow.
     Good news!  My computer is expected back tomorrow afternoon!  This time only taking three weeks instead of three months, maybe I should stop juggling it.  I can’t wait to get it back, hopefully with my iTunes and pictures still available.  14,000 songs… (mostly thanks to Kyle) …that’s not something you want to try to reattain and reorganize.  *crosses fingers*  My cell phone is… still without life.  Sadly.
     Lately, I’ve been learning how to mend things, such as, the bottoms of pants and little holes where stitching has come undone.  With that, comes the urge to learn to quilt.  I thought knitting would satisfy my interest in the world of sewing but it’s actually stirred up more interest.  I still have 2/5ths (yes, 2/5ths) of a scarf to knit but I keep finding myself practicing sewing together pieces of fabric for this wishful quilt.  I know nothing about actual quilting but I found this picture, and I blame it for peaking my interest:  http://img.alibaba.com/photo/10862973/Textiles_Bedsheet_Wall_Hangings_Cushioncover_Quilts_Carpet.jpg
And so, in love, I fell.  My “to do” list grows.
     Jared’s band had pictures made yesterday and I think they turned out pretty great!  Handsome fellas.
http://www.myspace.com/rosewaymusic  –  The smiling one is my favorite.  Oh, and Jared is the fella with the beard and … -.- …sideways hat.  Ahahaa.  Silly.  At least it’s a step up from the beanie.    Giggle, giggle, nudge, nudge.  Speaking of it… although a trip to Portland sounds scary and expensive (mostly expensive), the more I think about it, the more it grows on me.  We shall see.
     Other than all of that, I’ve been trying to decide what to bring to the Thanksgiving get-together.  Roasted corn or green bean casserole, pecan pie or Oreo layer cake.  Ya know, I really should get out and bungee jump from a bridge or go cliff-diving… something… B.B. King said it best, “the thrill is gone”.  Ahahaa, no, I just feel as if I’ve gone from age 20 to 48 (maybe even 84) in a matter of three months.  Maybe this is what maturity feels like.  Does maturity have a social life?  I should look more into things before I just let them happen to me.
     OH — before I close, Whitney had her hair chopped off today (whilst I sat beside Cousin It – never a dull moment)!  I’ll post a few pictures tomorrow.  It looks great and it’s very fitting, especially the flip-out-age.   So very cute.

Well, tah*dah, that wasn’t so painful.
I’ll probably spend the rest of the night talking to Mr. J-rad and knitting.
Or working at this guitar playing ability.
And wishing for cold weather already. 

“Ever since I learned to curse, I’ve been using those sorry old words.
But I’m talking to these children and I’m keeping it clean.
I don’t need those words to say what I mean -no,
I don’t need those words to say what I mean.”

Paz.